I feel like a worthless idiot. I can't help my child with he

I feel like a worthless idiot. I can't help my child with her homework and she's almost 15 and refuses to try. My mom is at my house helping her and I had to leave because in my mind the situation is more chaotic than it is in reality, and I would make things bad. It gives me jitters and panic attacks that my daughter is so unorganized and things take her so long because she refuses to give effort. It really depresses me. I know I'm her mom and I'm supposed to have this patient love but I don't have it. I care about her but she aggravate me because she does things on purpose or she'll go to no end to get her way no matter how inconvenient it is for any one else

Comment
 18
View 15 More Comments
Azzie's picture
[1030]
Oct 14

Hi im sorry about your stress, but i have some input ob the other side of the situation. Do you have any idea as to why she is acting this way? I'm sorry if you mentioned anything elsewhere I'm on my phone right now and it's hard to navigate. Anyway, teenagers can be impulsive or exaggerate etc because their brain hasn't fully developed yet. But the thing where anything they do is because they are a teen is a huge and dangerous misconception. People of all ages usually do have reasons behind their behavior. The acting out is a lot of the time an indicator of a problem. She might be having feelings she doesn't know how do deal with about situations at home or school, she might be having anxiety or depression herself. Doing things like calling the police on her, acting like she is a cause of a Problem within a home is going to make her more distrustful of you or even resentful and less likely to share her problems with you. I would suggest persistently trying to show her you're on her side and always will be there for her instead. Try talking to her but always respect her boundaries. I know a lot of parents would be convinced that this is exactly what they're doing, but the key point is to not make her do things, but let her make her own decisions for herself in the comfort of knowing you're there for her if she needs you.

show more ⇓
Reply
Wannabuyaheart's picture
[2015]
Oct 15

@twilli that sounds like a good idea twilli, I may try that too.

Reply
Wannabuyaheart's picture
[2015]
Oct 15

@Azzie I hear you for the most part but she needs to earn trust as well. I'm not going to allow her to terrorize me. It's rather beat the living crap out of her or call the police. The second hole she purposely kicked in my wall and we may have to agree to disagree if the only way I can make her trust me is to allow her to tear up my home with no consequences then I just don't need her trust. I've taken her to counseling several times. I'll go to the moon and back to help her but she's not going to terrorize me while I just lay down and take it.

Reply

Login or Register

You are visiting Support Groups as an anonymous user.

Please consider joining our community and gain access to additional features by

registering or logging into your account